April Showers

What's that saying about April? April showers bring May flowers?


There is a slowness in this time just before taxes, and as such, my mind turned away from this in search of something to occupy it, to keep from worrying how long it would last...I'd prefer to write about happy, positive things.

I read a lot of Crowley and sex magic and I feel that it misses some element that I desire. It feels written by men, for men and though he praises Babalon, I can't help but think he wouldn't know the Goddess if she pinned him down and had her way with him!

I read about sacred intimacy and tantra and sex therapy and feel something missing too. I love the feminine, receptive quality and emphasis on the healing that can take place. They acknowledge that a genuine connection between two people is healing in itself.  There is also a serious sense to all this, and I miss a sense of playfulness and the power of taboo.

But truly, in my best sessions, these elements are barely in the background, if present at all. There is respect, a mutual trust, connection, playfulness, and the edge of doing potentially naughty things. It is doing one's will. And somehow, these delightful, tingling, naughty play times are healing--to myself and I hope also to those who see me. It's my desire to create an experience that is whatever they are seeking. It can be healing, wholesome, naughty, indulgent or something in between.

A Desire for Newness

It's funny, as I reach out to new experiences in sacred intimacy, in designing a new blog site and brainstorming a new business plan, I find a desire for newness: for a new name, new site, new ads & marketing. A new openness too--finding other communities besides RedBook.

I'm outgrowing this Electra Blue name--and after finding a spam mail sent through my e-mail, I am ready to ditch it in favor of a new address.

I don't know how much longer I will have this site, but you can be sure I will send links to the new blog when it begins to look presentable (Ugh, I know, I'm a perfectionist!)

Redbook hasn't been the best for business lately anyway. My service is taking on a greater depth that doesn't seem to be experienced much in RB.  I want to share in this sacred sexual healing modality, but I don't see a demand for in it RB.  Looking for greener pastures now...

Creating Sacredness

When I started on this path, I was drawn to the idea that it could be done  in a sacred way--that, in ancient times, sex *was* a sacred thing.  I loved the idea, but I wasn't sure how it would take form for me in the modern day.

Experience is the best teacher, so I went out and got some experience. Even the few shitty experiences I've had taught me invaluable lessons Some weeks, I have felt more sacred than others--when I take the time out to focus my intentions, it's so much better than the few times I've felt rushed, or just in that headspace.

I knew I needed to give myself time to learn, to test things. I needed to find out what worked best for me, and how to bring sacredness to my work without sounding or feeling like a airy new-age type. I needed to balance the sacred work with the fun of "being bad," and find a way to make them work together.

Babalon has given me this key.  And now, finally, I feel ready to take this big step and truly devote my work to her--to make it Work. It gives me the courage to focus on sacred sexuality.

Expect big changes on this front! I'm taking steps to create my own website (bye bye Blogger) and re-do my marketing on this angle. 

I'll always be that fun-loving, taboo-indulging girl.  But now, I also want to pull out that healing, sacred spirit that banishes doubt and guilt.

Sacred Whore vs Sacred Intimate

I have been reading up on the subject lately.  I'm observing a tendency of political correctness, or perhaps just an emphasis on the healing, spiritual and academic side of it. In more "serious work" about the topic of sacred harlotry (aka-not my blog), they call it sacred intimacy, erotic shamanism (my favorite of the group), erotic bodywork...they skirt around that sex may go on and money is exchanged. The healing, the touch is the important part.

But there's something I relish in the term sacred whore! Precisely because our culture (and many people) would say those two things don't go together.  It's the reason why I prefer the term witch instead of pagan.  They embrace the bad girl and embrace the healing of shadow work.

From a legal viewpoint, also, I see why they choose these phrases. I see why they choose to bring light into a shadowy world.  I have always sought balance, and want to acknowledge the shadows while bringing in the light.

Temple of the Red Lotus

It's time for another post about my pet subject: sacred harlotry. Recently, I came across this site: Temple of the Red Lotus.  A temple of sacred sex in FL that has workshops and offers priestess training as a Qadishtu (another term for sacred harlot, although more specific.)

I like a lot of what they say, but when I compare it to the world of RB, it's a little plain, and just a little on the stuffy side.  If someone is really interested in the topic, there's much to learn, but I'm not sure I could run the same business using that terminology.

One of the best parts about this is the *fun* and a bit of glitz with naughtiness sprinkles. There's a spiritual aspect in serving and giving pleasure, but with that is providing a fun and entertaining experience. It's about finding that little something and enjoying the moment. Of course, there's the business parts of it too, but I don't find the sex to be business-like at all. I don't ever want it to be business-like. And as long as it stays fresh for me, I'll keep going.

Ideas of Sacred Harlotry

"I think it's better to have ideas. You can change an idea. Changing a belief is trickier."  -Rufus, from Dogma

In a previous post, "Secret Conversations", I got a comment that made me want to research more about this sacred harlotry I talk so much about.  It's this idea that I somehow aspire to, but what exactly is it?  I need to know about the history and present of this, idea. And I need to dive into the personal and figure out: in no uncertain terms, what do I aspire to be when I say I want to be a sacred whore.  (And does merely wanting to be one make me one?)

In my search, I found a page with an amazing conversation on the subject of sacred harlotry and just how much of our supposed evidence is really there, and on what basis can one look to history for a foundation. (do we *need* to basis modern harlotry on ancient so-called tradition? Can it be done?)  Not only does the exchange contain many insights, but a lot of links for me to continue my research.  The conversation can be found here, on the Barbelith Underground site.

 I enjoy the rich mythology of the ancient sacred harlot, but I'd be foolish to suggest we could piece together a complete set of guidelines based on ancient Mesopotamian and Greek writings. Nor do Eastern traditions suit me, for it feels too much like cultural appropriation. I'm more interesting in finding my own personal truths to form a modern tradition.

Can't wait to dive into more of these articles!