After a period of wanting and waiting, I'm finally starting to find a good balance between work and my other interests. In doing so, work is much less "work-like." I'm enjoying myself so much more when I banish all worry from my space. Less questioning my own motives and goals behind it (I *do tend to over-analyze things) and more going with the flow.
I don't know if most providers are extroverts, that does seem to be the case, but I've always been an introvert. However, one-on-one is where I start to blossom. I really enjoy focusing on another person and tending to their needs (part of that submissive behavior).
There was also blackberry picking, and the beginnings of a collage series. Hiking through pockets of urban wilderness is one of the many reasons I love SF. So many blackberries grow all over lands end, berries in different stages of ripeness. I take only the ripest, purple-black berries that pull off so easily. There are brambles too, but some masochistic tendency in me enjoys that too. I like slipping in nimble fingers to pick those hidden in the underside of the bush, navigating the thorny stems. Picking my fill is a bit of an endurance trial, but I gladly endure it. These hard-won berries make the best scones, the best pie.
I have been working on my art a bit more, collecting images, colors and textures for a series of collages about whoring and sacred whoring. I plan on posting some as I finish them.
But the bit of solitude gets me eager to go out once again. The ritual of putting on makeup and dressing up, making myself ready a client, it helps turn my mind into a different mode and builds my excitement for the main event. In this mode, I'm better able to relax and help relax my client. In finding my center, I hope to be able to pass that on in my sessions too.
No comments:
Post a Comment